In the course of my life, I have traveled to eight different
countries, many of them on my own. I
have scurried across lonely moors, peaked over cliffs, climbed on top of a
bridge, slept in a snow hotel, and soaked in such amazing beauty from mountaintops
that it hurt to breathe. Yet it is this
next adventure that is turning out to be the most challenging thus far.
Of course, each adventure has had its own elements of
challenge like getting lost on a moor in the middle of England; almost falling
off cliffs; missing my train; being sick; torrential rain; roommate issues; and
muscles that screamed for me to stop when the mountain top was in sight. However, these challenges were temporary. There
was some comfort in knowing I would be going back to the safe confines of my
home and all that’s familiar, a safety net allowing me to fly into the unknown,
to be brave for a while. But what
happens when the familiar is shaken, good turns to mediocre, and life as you know
it is no longer good enough? This
adventure has been challenging because it is not just a temporary jaunt. It is the beginning of the next chapter in my
life.
In an instant it seems, life changed. Circumstances changed. I changed.
It was as if I had grown out of my britches and needed to get the next
size up. The problem is, I’m not a huge
fan of change. I like the comfy and
coziness that familiarity brings. That was evident in the first grade when
after a growth spurt; I refused to wear my new jeans and had my mom sew lace on
the cuffs of my old pair to hide my bare ankles. But unfulfilling work assignments with no
chance of advancement or pay increase, a newly acquired Masters degree that
needs to be used, and the news my housemates will be moving has motivated me to
look past the comfiness and into the unknown, daring me to imagine my life
differently, daring me to be brave.
I have no clue what this next adventure will look like but three
desires remain clear: I wanted to pursue a career as a Corporate Trainer; live
in an area with lots of trees somewhat close to family (but willing to move
anywhere for a year or two); and make enough money to support myself. The idea of finding another job in such hard,
economic times is daunting. Working in
HR, I hear stories of applicants job-hunting for over two years with barely a
nibble. It doesn’t look good for me,
especially wanting to break into a new field.
But isn’t that how God works? He
is the God of impossibilities, making water into wine; turning loaves and
fishes into a meal for the multitudes; has a shrimp of a guy defeat a giant;
and an orphan girl become a queen and risk her life to save a nation.
When all around me seems blurry, it is then the foundational
truths of who I am become clear again and on them I stand:
1. I was created on purpose for a purpose to bring God
glory.
2. God has good plans for me.
3. I can do all things through Him who gives me
strength.
With the audacity of Jacob wrestling the angel for a
blessing, I brought in the new year of 2012 with a commitment to God. I would give up watching TV on Sundays until He
provides me another job. I enjoy
watching TV, sometimes too much, so of all the things to fast, this is significant. It’s interesting how life’s circumstances
bring us back to a place of need, of want, of desperation with God, how they
force us with the choice to be brave.
I realize the door is closing for me in Monterey, a 17-year
jaunt, 13 of those years with my housemates.
Even with this huge mountain of change looming over me casting daunting
shadows on my path, I know there is no going back. I am reaching out to the One who knows the
way and will help me be brave. I admit I am a bit excited at what will unfold
in this next chapter of my life. This is going to be an interesting adventure!
