Being Real in a Fake World

I confess I’m in a mood. I recognize the symptoms when life around me takes on the tint of gray in the midst of a beautiful, sunny day, like today. When happy people, especially lovers exhibiting PDA (public displays of affection) make me roll my eyes in disgust. Or when that dull pain in my forehead spreads to my jaw, letting me know I’m clenching my teeth, a sign of stress my dentist would highly disapprove of. Like the character ‘Stuart’ in the self-named comedy skit on Mad TV, I am on the path to my dark place, a place I don’t want to hang around for long. When I get in a mood, I try to be real with myself so I don’t stay here permanently. Like quicksand, the moody symptoms can trap you the more you flirt with their negative power.

In my self-exploration, I realized I’m tired of living in a fake world. We’re living in a fast-paced world that’s trying to do too many things at the same time. We pride ourselves at multi-tasking, but how much are we really getting done? In our feeble attempt at juggling, what falls to the ground? We end up putting on a mask of polite affections just to get through the day as smooth as possible, undetected by life’s little glitches often found in the lives of other people.

As I was leaving church today, I saw a friend who I hadn’t talked to in a while. In my state of moodiness, I was thankful to see a familiar face. She asked me “How are you?” but before I could reply, she answered for me, “Crazy, busy, right?” as she chaotically passed through the lobby doors in search for the rest of her family. Before I knew it, we were in the parking lot and they were headed towards their car.

I realize this famed question is part of the introduction in American culture, but just because something’s cultural doesn’t mean it’s biblical. Being real takes time, patience, flexibility, and a selfless attitude. It takes having Jesus actively living in our lives and being obedient to his prodding on our heart so we can be His hands and feet to those in need. I know today I could have used a sincere “how are you” with time to hear my honest reply.

Our culture is full of this plague of polite affections, sayings such as:

“How are you?”
“Let’s get together sometime.”
“You’re in my thoughts and prayers.”
“Let’s do lunch.”
“I’ll call you.”

The question is, do we mean them? If we are saying things we have no intension of doing or don’t plan on sticking around to hear the answer, we’re hypocrites. The power to influence others for good with our words and actions is lost by our lack of sincerity.

I see this fakeness seeping into the church. Just today, I was standing in the sanctuary singing the words on the overhead screen. The blue lights that framed the stage highlighted the flashy PowerPoint background with its swirling colors of blue and purple. It was a nice show filled with warm fuzzies and fresh coffee in hand, but this was supposed to be a time of worship to the Creator of the Universe. I found myself questioning, “Do those people on stage mean what they’re singing?” “Do I mean what I’m singing? Am I being real with God or just being polite, going through the motions so I blend in?” I found myself closing my eyes, asking God to block out these visual niceties so He could take me to His secret place, out of my dark place, so I could be with Him and Him alone.

I’m concerned that in today’s media-crazed culture, the church has succumbed to marketing God, trying to give Him a hip, new makeover with catchy church names and cool-looking flyers that aren’t too ‘Christian’ so He’ll have cool image, all in an effort to get people to hang out with Him. While trying to reach out to some, it can come across as fake and deceptive to others. I realized today, my heart is tired of fluff and fake truth. It’s a phony filler. I want the real thing. I want God and Him alone.

Despite my mood, I must be real with myself. I must forgive. Forgiveness paves the way for peace; it parts the seas; mends friendships; and makes the gray skies blue again. Forgiveness gives me freedom. As I release these burdens to God, I look forward to coming out of my dark place, making peace with the lovers I walk past, relieving my head of its tension headache, and enjoying a beautifully sunny day tomorrow. Experiencing the reality of a warm, sunny day in February when the rest of the world is deluged in snow is truly a gift no one can fake. For that I am thankful.